So, your little one is crying, you have checked if their diaper is clean, you’ve fed them, and they don’t seem to have anything wrong with them other than the fact that they are crying. It’s overwhelming and frustrating and we just feel awful because we aren’t sure what’s making them cry.
Is it possible that there is no reason for your baby to be crying? Not in my opinion.
Let’s talk about the many driving factors that could be causing this, what we can do about it, and when we should let it be. Perhaps this will help with our understanding of why babies cry.
The Cry Factors
Our babies can have many reasons to cry, as they cannot communicate the way we do, crying is essentially their way of dealing with emotions and physical discomfort. One thing most babies feel at the beginning of their life is being overwhelmed.
Their entire world changes the minute they are born. This safe and relatively quiet environment in their mother’s womb is all they have until this day. They are then transported to this new environment that they don’t understand, and it is filled with extra loud noises and new sensations.
And because they don’t understand, and they don’t have our communication tools, they express this overwhelming feeling by crying. They can’t process emotions the way adults do, even older children cannot always do this. There’s all these big emotions and no way to express it.
Some other common factors of your crying baby are the usual things;
- I’m hungry
- I’m wet
- I’m cold or hot
- I want to be held
- I want to move
- Something hurts
- I’m not comfortable
- I just want you
- Colic
- I’m tired
There could certainly be other reasons for your baby to be upset, these are just the most common in my experience and according to the Mayo Clinic. I guess being a mom more than once makes you an expert!
What to Do if It’s Colic
Colic is a major thing with babies, and other than oral remedies there are things you can do physically in order to soothe this.
Because colic is not something you can see, it can be hard to discern if this is the reason for your baby’s tears. The best way I have found to find out if this is the issue is to physically help them.
- Lay them on their tummy on your leg, while holding their head, softly bounce your leg and pat their back.
- This will put some pressure on their stomach and give them a soothing movement.
- If you are uncomfortable using your leg, do this on the couch or the ground without the slow bounce, this still gives them some pressure on their stomach, and the patting motion can help them spit up and ease the colic.
- This will put some pressure on their stomach and give them a soothing movement.
- Give them a tummy massage.
- Without too much pressure, gently massage your baby’s tummy while they are upright. Doing this while they are on their back can be dangerous if they spit up and choke.
- The usual put the baby on your shoulder trick.
- This is a default one that many people resort to, as this is how they get air bubbles out. Simply have your baby against you with their head laying on your shoulder and pat their back.
These are tricks my mom taught me, if your baby does not cry, or cries less during these motions chances are colic is definitely the culprit!
Well, What if None of These Issues Seem to Be Present?
When my children were babies and I had ensured their needs were met yet they still cried, I would wrap them up and lay their little faces on mine. This would be the most effective way for me to help them calm down.
This physical touch brought skin-to-skin contact and my smell would comfort them. Skin-to-skin contact is important for bonding for babies. I would also lay them on my chest, when babies are in the womb the heartbeat is something they are used to hearing, by laying on your chest can be a very calming moment for the baby.
Finding The Calm or Cry It Out
Sometimes, calm is the most important thing you can give them to soothe them. As said at the beginning of this article, being overwhelmed is very common for babies.
Assuming that nothing seems to really be helping your little one stop crying, letting them cry it out for a certain amount of time is not a crime. Especially if they are just tired.
After attending to their needs put your baby somewhere safe like their crib or bassinet as they cry it out for a set time. If after that time they are still upset, give them your presence again. You cannot “spoil” a baby, you are what they know and what comforts them. Even though they can’t say it, they love you and need you to be comforted and calm.
Making Time for Self-Care
Our crying babies whom we love very much can be overwhelming sometimes. It is so important for you to practice self-care, especially when there is so much to do for your baby and seemingly unending crying.
When your baby is sleeping you have the perfect moment to practice self-care. Simply take this time to meet your needs.
When a parent is not practicing self-care they end up running on fumes and all of a sudden crying makes you feel even worse and puts you on edge. Do your baby and yourself a favor and practice self-care for at least 10 minutes every day. Happy parent, happy child!
Final Thoughts
While we, as adults, cannot always understand the purpose of the baby crying there is almost always a reason. Even if it isn’t a reason we would cry, it is a reason for them. Especially because this is the only way they know how to communicate.
We actually foster this type of comprehension within them because every time they cry, a caregiver gives them some type of reaction to help them. Such as changing the diaper or feeding. This feeds their knowledge by showing them that crying gets their needs met because they cannot talk.
ALSO READ: At What Age Do Kids Stop Napping?
