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The Digital Parents > Blog > Parenting Tips and Advice > Reasons Why Parents Need to Stop Comparing Their Children to Others
Parenting Tips and Advice

Reasons Why Parents Need to Stop Comparing Their Children to Others

Vesna Saveva
Last updated: 2023/07/14
Vesna Saveva
5 Min Read
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Many reasons support the claim that parents must stop comparing their children to others. These comparisons can cause children to feel bad, ultimately leading to a cold family atmosphere.

So, in this article, we’ll discuss why comparing children to others isn’t a smart parental decision.

How Comparing Children With Others Affects Their Motivation

Parents sometimes feel the need to compare their children with others to motivate and encourage them. But that can cause a counter effect on your children’s mental health. They’ll feel less motivated and willing to work.

That can later lead to sadness and depression in children. Studies have shown that about 3% of children battle depression.

But why do children feel such a way when compared to others? Well, firstly, it lowers their self-esteem. Children feel like they’re not good enough and can’t compete with others.

Moreover, they feel like they disappoint their parents, which also discourages them from working harder.

So, if you compare your children with others, don’t expect their grades will magically get better. It might actually be the opposite.

The Effects of Comparing Children With Others On Parent-Child Relationships

Comparing your children with others may hinder the growth of your parent-child relationship. Your child will feel discouraged, avoid you, and won’t even talk to you. And believe me, no parent wants that!

Your children will isolate themselves and might resort to addictions, such as alcohol, cigarettes, drugs, and tech addiction.

That leads to long-term consequences on children’s mental and physical health. So, don’t compare!

The Effects Of Comparisons With Others on Children’s Social Life

When you compare your children with others, they’ll feel inferior to their friends. That will make their social life harder.

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Having low social self-esteem can take a toll on your children’s mental growth and development. Children with stable friendships can learn new things, explore different cultures, and have fun.

But when your children are afraid to communicate, they’ll miss out on many priceless moments and memories.

Alternative Ways to Motivate Your Children

As we already said, comparing your children with others isn’t a good method to motivate them. So, in the following paragraphs, we’ll look at some alternative ways to encourage your little ones.

·         Working Together

Sitting down and working together with your children may encourage them to achieve their goals faster.

You can motivate them along the way by congratulating and celebrating their milestones (we’ll talk more about that later).

Correct your children’s mistakes and teach them how to finish the task properly, no matter how hard. And never forget to be friendly, calm, and have fun with your children. Family memories last a lifetime!

·         Rewarding Your Children

Keep track of the progress your children have regarding a specific task. That can include homework, studying, etc. Make a calendar list, mark the milestones, and celebrate reaching them with your children.

Such activities can increase your parent-child relationship while motivating your children to reach their goals.

For example, when my children reach certain milestones, I like to cook them their favorite meals or play some games with them.

Conclusion

We can conclude that comparing your children with others doesn’t benefit their mental growth.

So, if you often compare your little ones with their peers, stop it. Think about your decisions and how they affect your children.

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If you want happy children, you must do what’s best for them. Even if that means you cross your own borders.

Be patient and compassionate, and show your children true parental care and love. Every child deserves it!

ALSO READ: How to Let Go of Your Adult Children

Vesna Saveva July 14, 2023 July 14, 2023
Previous Article How to Let Go of Your Adult Children
Next Article Things To Do If Your Child is Manipulating You
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